Boil water, add rice vermicelli, and cook 2–4 minutes until just tender. Drain and rinse under cold water so they don't clump into a sad noodle brick.
In a jar or bowl, whisk lime juice, rice vinegar, soy, fish sauce (if using), honey, sesame oil, neutral oil, ginger, garlic, and chili-garlic sauce. Adjust heat and sweetness to your vibe. Add sesame seeds for extra sparkle.
Shred cabbages, julienne carrots, slice bell pepper, cucumber, and scallions. Tear herbs roughly—big leaves mean big flavor hits.
Sear tofu or tempeh until golden; grill or pan-sear chicken; quickly sauté shrimp until pink. Season lightly with salt and a squeeze of lime. Keep it simple so the dressing can flex.
In a big bowl, layer cabbage, carrots, bell pepper, cucumber, scallions, and noodles. Add sprouts and herbs. Toss gently with half the dressing first.
Top with avocado slices, your protein, and chopped peanuts. Drizzle more dressing as needed. Snap a pic (obviously), then devour.